this is a new year.

i hated so many things about last year.

i lost a lot.......a husband, stability, income, direction, self-esteem, friends, my future as i knew it, a lot of sleep, and 70 pounds.

i also gained last year. self respect, control over MY life again, confidence, new friends, love for myself, charity, a new face in the mirror, and greater love for my children.

lessons i learned: life is hard and not always fair, free agency can be such a blessing and curse depending how you look at it, it's easy to judge others, but more difficult to just love them, if you want something bad enough you can achieve it.

the biggest lesson learned: i am glad to be the person i am. before i wasn't always sure, but i can honestly say now that i like being me, flaws and all.....because there is really so many more good things to me than just my flaws......i had to depend on those good things about me to get me through this year.

i have set some new goals for myself for this year. as i think it's a good tradition for every year. this last year was probably one of the first years that i took my list seriously and actually accomplished some of them. i hope to make even more of my goals realities this year.

these goals for me have been a way for me to measure my own progress in life.....am i going anywhere? or just being a time waster.

i never want to be the later.